If this is a movie

I haven't been writing here in so long. I have been in foul mood for the last couple of weeks. That kind of emotion wasn't the bestest time for me to write off course. I feel like the works and experiments are the one that are chasing after me. Sometimes there are so much things to do that I finally sit quietly and do nothing as I don't know how or where to start. But, with only a year left of my official PhD ahead of me, with friends around me graduating, I need to chase after those experiments, simulations and paper writing. And it is even haunting me now. Last night I had a dream, a friend of mine has graduated with a PhD and in that dream I was very sad because I'm still here struggling. And I can still remember, the feeling that I won't be able to finish my PhD. I'm hoping that it will turn the other way around in reality as the elders always say. Sometimes I feel as if life is a movie where I am the main actor. I just like to pretend that I am acting in a movie. I know that sounds funny, but I think this is good because it just makes me feel great and I will be in an awesome mood all day long. If you don't believe me, have your own shot. I insist indeed!

So life updates. My experiments are progressing alhamdulillah, I just need to put extra hard work to complete my study on time but that is the biggest challenge. On financial part, I'm starting to feel the burden when about 30% of my income is spent for the car. I visit shopping complex less obviously. Even if I do I only window shop, But the good thing is I won't buy unnecessary things anymore. I have been thinking of taking a part time job such as be a tutor at tuition center but with the work loads I'm not sure if I can manage my time wisely. So, that will be on my list to think of. On travelling part, I have traveled to Universal Studio Singapore, the first theme park that I have ever visited in my entire life. It was incredible! I have so much fun there and took a lots of photos. The best part was the transformer ride. The 4D effects were so real. We took the ride twice and if it was not because of the long queue I would absolutely take another ride. I am very impressed indeed, somehow I feel like I want to invent something that will make the world impressed too. One day insyaallah.

So tonight I will be heading home. Home's home. I haven't visited my mom for four months and I am very excited. I miss her a lot! I am too excited that I can't do experiments anymore these couple of days. It's not because I don't want to. I did but everything's just went wrong. Isn't it the strong indicator that my heart is now at home. Yay! I can't wait to kiss my mom's hand tomorrow morning! I can't wait to be at my magical place where the second I step in, I will feel like somewhere else, in an absolute peace, because I know that above a certain point in the universe, everything's ok. That none of these worries, those failed experiments and things that have going on in my head, they don't matter at all. It is true that no matter how successful we are, how far we go, how comfortable our place we are in now and how old we get, we always need a place to call home. I hope that I will have a safe and sound journey, and have a blissful time at home.

'When it comes to family, we're all still children at heart. No matter how old we get, we always need a place to call home. Because without the people you love most, you can't help but feel all alone in the world'

-Gossip Girl-

Universal Studio Singapore, March 2012